twenty more

whoops!

2012-01-08T23:56:00.001+08:00

I tried to blog at work the other day – because I had finished my story and didn’t have anything else to do and was waiting to go home.

My colleague sort of caught me, and I was a little embarrassed. So I quickly mumbled something and closed the window.

Didn’t manage to blog in the end.

2011-08-11T18:06:00.001+08:00

who will save your soul?

2011-06-24T18:21:00.001+08:00

“For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul?” (Mark 8:36-NKJV)

2011-06-24T00:00:00.001+08:00

http://www.pbfcomics.com

2011-06-17T15:08:00.001+08:00

the things that matter

2011-06-17T14:14:00.001+08:00

Do take some time to watch/listen to this.

one step at a time

2011-06-17T14:10:00.001+08:00

“Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.

Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.

Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.”

Proverbs 4:25-27

trust & obey

2011-06-15T16:40:00.001+08:00

It is hard to imagine, let alone believe that tomorrow might just be our last.

****

O Lord, in this time, let Your voice be heard clearly over the storm.

Break out!

2011-05-11T11:08:00.001+08:00

the chromosom - X

2011-04-29T10:35:00.001+08:00

An illustration I thought of yesterday, as I was arguing with Yew Meng that women are emotionally driven and most of what we do/say/think are emotionally motivated, while men are just not built that way – so stop telling me to “not base my arguments on my feelings” (he hates it when I say “I feel that…”.

The Woman On A Horse theory.

A woman and her emotions is like a horsewoman (the female “horseman”) who goes everywhere, does everything while sitting on her horse. Her horse called “emotions”. If her horse is untamed and wild, she too, sitting upon that horse will just be carried wherever the horse takes her – the horse becomes the master. But if the horse is bridled, under control – then it is the woman who masters the horse, not the other way around – and it would be for her benefit. Of course, the woman could get down from her horse – but imagine an emotionally detached woman/mother/girlfriend/wife.

Men, on the other hand, are less attached to their “emotion” horses. They swap between emotions and logic, which is what makes them so frustrating, sometimes (I’m not asking you for a solution! I just want you to listen to me rant and empathize with me!). That’s just how we were built, men and women.

Do you agree?

(lessons from) my volatile wiper

2011-04-28T21:48:00.002+08:00

But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush and Seba in your stead.
Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give men in exchange for you,
and people in exchange for your life.
Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west.
I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’
and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’
Bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the ends of the earth -
everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made.
(Isaiah 43:1-7)

So. On Tuesday I had an OT appointment for an interview at 7.30 p.m. in Subang. I should have left earlier, perhaps…because at 6.30 it started to rain. And OH BOY did it pour! A little worried that I would be late for my appointment, our editor offered to lead me to Subang using a shortcut she knew. She also noted that its not always jammed going to Subang when it rains.

She was right! To my great surprise (I have to endure the LDP every.single.day – yes, that includes weekends – the LDP is our Bangkok) it wasn’t that jammed. By the time we got on the Federal highway it was pretty clear and cars were zooming past, all probably thinking “I’d better get home quick, before the jam starts!”.

It would have been better, maybe, for me at least, if it WAS jammed…because suddenly my wiper stopped working!

Rain was pelting on my windscreen and I felt paralyzed – “I’m WILLING it to move, but it’s not moving”. I couldn’t see a thing! I prayed “Lord! Help! I can’t stop the car now, but at the same time I can’t see where I’m going!”. Suddenly I felt a HUGE SPRAY, like the Niagara Falls was falling on my car. I had unwittingly passed under a flyover and the rain water was spilling down from it! My screen cleared for awhile.

I was supposed to meet my interviewee, Dr. Kumar at Taj Curry House. I had no idea where that was and Dr. Kumar had said “near SJMC”. As you probably know, SJMC is NOT SJMC anymore. Now it is “Sime Darby Medical Centre”. So, instead of calling anyone to check, I decided to consult my “state-of-the-art” Blackberry GPS – which very confidently pointed to Puchong!

Alamak! But…my wiper is not working…how??? I contemplated calling off the appointment, but Dr. Kumar had come all the way from Banting to meet me. I just didn’t have the heart. Insanely, I decided to go on to Puchong even though I could not see a thing.

The sky grew darker and whatever blurry vision I had of the road before disappeared. Soon I was literally driving blindly…all the praying, “GOD let me not bang into a divider! Or another car! Or fall off the highway!” and then thinking, “oklah…if I go Home to Jesus today, that’s ok. That’s ok, Lord”.

Guess my time wasn’t up yet, God still has work for me to do here. I saw an Esso station out of my side windows and headed towards that. Upon reaching, I turned off the engine, wiped my windscreen and THEN called Dr. Kumar again.

Me : Dr. Kumar…the restaurant is in Puchong ah?
Dr. Kumar : PUCHONG??? No! It’s right opposite SJMC, now Sime Darby.
Me : *Slaps forehead*

Before starting my car again, I prayed for my wipers, and they came back on (and is working today…don’t know why they failed that time) and made my way back to Subang, where I was at the beginning.

The incident showed me some things about God and my relationship with Him. Even though I WAS NOT smart not to double check with Dr. Kumar about the venue, instead relying on my GPS and that ended up with me being in such a scary situation– it taught me that God is able to turn any situation for good, and in this case, for me to learn something about Him.

Later that night, I read about God delivering the Israelites out of Egypt. (you can read about that here). Reflecting on previous events that day, I could only draw the conclusion that God is faithful, forever, to His people. His people at that time, were the nation of Israel.

But today, because Jesus Christ has died for our sins so that we too can experience God’s love, we are His people. He is relentless in His love for us and forever faithful to us. May we be as relentless in our love and faith for Him.

***I know “volatile” doesn’t really fit, but, I couldn’t find a better word that starts with V!

Underrated

2011-04-27T16:36:00.001+08:00

I think talking is overrated & holding back is underrated.

Biting your tongue.

The Bible says in Proverbs 10:19 “When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.”

James describes the tongue as “a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.”

Out of the abundance of your heart, your mouth speaks. What comes out shows what is going on inside.

Only one life, soon ‘twill be past.

2011-04-24T18:12:00.001+08:00

let the lamp of my life burn out for Thee.

by C.T. Studd

“Two little lines I heard one day,
Traveling along life’s busy way;
Bringing conviction to my heart,
And from my mind would not depart;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one,
Soon will its fleeting hours be done;
Then, in ‘that day’ my Lord to meet,
And stand before His Judgment seat;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, the still small voice,
Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave,
And to God’s holy will to cleave;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, a few brief years,
Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill,
living for self or in His will;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

When this bright world would tempt me sore,
When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way,
Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Give me Father, a purpose deep,
In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife,
Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Oh let my love with fervor burn,
And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone,
Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, “twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one,
Now let me say,”Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call,
I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last. ”

Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.
And when I am dying, how happy I’ll be,
If the lamp of my life has been burned out for Thee.

Blessed Easter! May the light and life of the Resurrected Saviour burn brightly in you, for all to see, all the days of your life & may each day be a greater, deeper experience of His love for you.

Quick Recap

2011-04-23T02:24:00.001+08:00

Today we went to the Zoo! :)

We made friends with

A giraffe

A family of raccoons. This guy got his head stepped on by his brother :(

An elephant

Camels

A bunch of lazy rhinoceroses

A depressed penguin

and a very friendly monkey. Hehe :P

Pretty pretty flowers and butterflies!

Yew Meng was eaten by a giant beetle!!! :(

and I turned into a half-tiger and had LOADS of fun! :)

Perhaps?

2011-04-20T01:40:00.001+08:00

How about this:

maybe a part of me won’t listen silently, to what you have to say
maybe I’m scared or maybe just half-deaf.
maybe if your voice were like thunder, like a raging storm
I would perk up and pay you heed;
I would hear the alarm bells from afar;
I would smell the scent of danger in the air, and run.
maybe if I ran to that faraway place, I would find you there.

Overwhelmed

2011-04-18T16:25:00.001+08:00

LORD I CAN’T DO THIS ON MY OWN.
Give me the strength to overcome.

N is for NOM NOMS.

2011-04-17T01:04:00.001+08:00

TASTE THE RAINBOW! :D

Hello it’s the end of Saturday Awwww :( . But what a lovely day it has been!

I forgot to unset my alarm, so I woke up to Switchfoot’s Stars, smiled when I remembered that it is the weekend and drifted in and out of sleep with the pitter patter of raindrops outside my window. Such a wonderful, cool morning. There is, really, absolutely nothing I like better than a rainy morning :)

Thank You, Lord for a wonderful rainy morning.

If I were to sum up today in a few words, I’d say: the weather was wonderful and we ate a lot.

The Youth joined the Ladies Fellowship at church today for their session on Tiger Mother, Shepherd Teacher by Ms. Nga Johnson; which they concluded with a fabulous “tea” spread. Salads, rendang, oodles of noodles, pulut rice, cakes, tiramisu. There were so many dishes, I couldn’t even manage to try everything! Everyone piled a little mountain of food on their plates. And by the time I was halfway through mine, I could hardly eat anymore.

That “tea” was at about 5.30p.m. Unfortunately in my excitement to EAT I forgot to take pictures of the glorious fooooood!

Then, at 7.30p.m., Julee, Raymond, Yew Meng, Daphne & I went for a charity do with a 10-coarse Chinese dinner. And the food was really good. Needless to say, we stuffed ourselves again…filling whatever space was left from “tea”. Yew Meng ate SO much chicken, I thought he was about to faint onto his plate! We left happy and round.

After dinner, I realised that Pops had left me durian in the fridge. So Yew Meng & I ate durian as we yelled rude language at the TV screen, watching the Sarawak elections analysis by some BN bigot.

It is 1.03 a.m. , and I am stuffed.

M for Minor Differences

2011-04-15T16:03:00.001+08:00

From http://theoatmeal.com/

Image Permalink

Love

2011-04-14T23:23:00.001+08:00

Trust me, I have not earn'd your dear rebuke,
I love, as you would have me, God the most;
Would lose not Him, but you, must one be lost,
Nor with Lot's wife cast back a faithless look
Unready to forego what I forsook;
This say I, having counted up the cost,
This, though I be the feeblest of God's host,
The sorriest sheep Christ shepherds with His crook.
Yet while I love my God the most, I deem
That I can never love you overmuch;
I love Him more, so let me love you too;
Yea, as I apprehend it, love is such
I cannot love you if I love not Him,
I cannot love Him if I love not you.

Maybe to love is to make grow, and sometimes to grow, you need to let go.

be Kind.

2011-04-14T01:40:00.001+08:00

“…make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ” (2 Peter 1:7)

Life of Cass, an excerpt from Have a Little Faith, by Mitch Albom. A true story.

The story of my recent life. I like that phrase. It makes more sense than the story of my life, because we get so many lives between birth and death. A life to be a child. A life to come of age. A life to wander, to settle, to fall in love, to parent, to test our promise, to realize our mortality – and, in some lucky cases, to do something after that realization.
          The Reb had achieved that.
          And so had someone else.
          Not Henry - although he certainly lived many lives.
But I refer here to his trusted elder, the man with one leg, who nudged and cajoled me until finally, on a cold night, in a plastic covered section of the church, he said, in a scratchy voice, “Mister Mitch, I got to share this with you…”
Anthony “Cass” Castelow, it turned out, did have an eye-popping tale: he’d been a star athlete in a big family, gone to the army, come home, become a local drug dealer.
          “But okay, now. Here’s what I really need to tell you…”
          And this is the story of his recent life.

***

“Eighteen years ago – back when I had both my legs – I was stabbed in the stomach in a place called Sweetheart’s Bar. I was selling drugs outa there. Two guys came in, and one guy grabbed me from behind and the other guy took the drugs and stabbed me. I nearly died in the hospital. I was gurgling blood. Doctors said I’d be lucky to live through the night. But when I got out, I went back to drugs again.
           “Not long after that, the drugs got me sent to prison. Three years, I became a Muslim in there, because Muslims were clean, they took care of their bodies, and a guy named Usur showed me how to pray, you know, five times a day, on the prayer mats, do the salahs, say ‘Alahu Akbar’.
           “But this guy, Usur, at the end of it all, he’d whisper, ‘In Jesus’ name, amen.’ I pulled him to the side one day and he says, ‘Listen man, I’m a Muslim in here, but my family out there, they’re Christian. I don’t know if its Allah or Jesus Christ after this life. I’m just trying to get in, you understand me? ‘Cause I ain’t never going home, Cass. Do you understand that I’m gonna die in here?’
           “Well, I left prison and that kinda messed me up. I drifted away from anything with God and I got back into drugs – crack, pills, weed. Lost all my money. With no place to go, I went back to the Jeffries Projects, where I grew up, and which was abandoned now and being torn down. I kicked in the back door of a unit and slept in there.
           “And that was the first night I called myself homeless.”

***

I nodded along as Cass spoke, still not sure where he was going with this. His hat was pulled over his ears and his glasses and graying beard gave him an almost artsy look, like an aged jazz musician, but his old brown jacket and his amputated leg told a truer tale. When he spoke, his few remaining teeth poked from his gums like tiny yellowed fence posts.
           He was determined to get through this story, so I rubbed my hands to keep warm and said, “Go on, Cass,” Smoke came from my mouth, that’s how cold it was in the church.
          “All right, Mister Mitch, now here’s the thing: I almost died a couple of times in the projects. Once, I came back at night and as soon as I walked in, someone whacked me over the head with a gun and cracked my skull open. I never did find out why. But they left me there for dead, bleeding, with my pants pulled down and my pockets turned out.”
          Cass leaned over and pulled off his hat. There was a three-inch scar on his head.
          “See that?”
          He pulled his hat back on.
          “Every night in that life, you would either be getting high or drunk or something to try and deal with the reality that you didn’t have no place to go. I’d make money all kinds of little ways. Take out garbage for a bar. Panhandle. And of course, I’d just steal. The hockey team and the baseball team, when they was playing, you could always sneak down there and steal one of them orange things and wave people’s cars in if you look decent enough, You say, ‘Park right here.’ Then you run with their money back to the projects and get high.”
          I shook my head. With all the hockey and baseball games I’d gone to, I might have handed Cass a few bills myself.
         “I was homeless pretty near five years,” he said. “Five years. Sleeping here or there in them abandoned projects. There was a winter night in the rain where I almost froze to death at a bus stop, my stupid behind out there with no place to go. And I was so hungry and so thin, my stomach was touching my back.
        “I had two pairs of pants, and they was both on me. I had three shirts, and all three of ‘em was on me. I had one gray coat, and it was my pillow, my cover, everything. And I had a pair of Converse gym shoes that had so many holes in it, I loaded my feet with baking soda to keep them from stinking.”
        Where did you get the baking soda?
        “Well, come on – we was all out there smoking crack. That’s what you cook it with. Everyone got baking soda!”
        I looked down, feeling stupid.
        “And then I heard about this man from New York, Covington. He drove around in this old limo, coming through the neighbourhood. He was from a church, so we called him Rebbey Reb.”
        Rebbey what? I said.
        “Reb.”

***

Cass leaned forward, squinting, as if everything to this point had been a prelude.
       “Reb come around every day with food on top of that car – on the hood, in the trunk. Vegetables. Milk, Juice. Meats. Anybody who was hungry could have some. Once he stopped that car, there’d be like forty or fifty people in a line.
       “He didn’t ask for nothing. Most he’d do was, at the end he’d say, ‘Remember, Jesus loves you.’ When you homeless, you don’t wanna hear much of that, ‘cause it's like, when you get through talking about Jesus, I gotta go back to living in this empty building, you know?
      “After awhile, Pastor got deliveries from these food bank organizations and he’d serve them out the side of his house in an empty field. A few of us made this grill next to his place and we’d heat the food up. People would come from blocks away, they’d bring a bowl, maybe a spoon if they got one – I seen people with plastic bags scooping up food and eating with their hands.
      “And Pastor would have a little service right there against his house. Say thanks to God.”
      Wait. Outside? Against his house?
      “That’s what I’m saying. So pretty soon, we’re liking this guy. We see him coming, we say ‘Here come Rebbey Reb. Hide the dope! Hide the liquor!’ And he’d give us a little money to help him unload the food trucks – turkeys, bread, juice. Me and a guy had our own unloading system: one for the church, two for us. We’d throw ours out in the bushes, then come back later and pick it up.
      “Eventually, Pastor come to me and say, ‘You got enough to eat, Cass? Take what you need.’ He knew what I was doing.
      “I felt ashamed.”

***

“One night in the projects, I had just gotten high and I hear Pastor call my name. I’m embarrassed to come out. My eyes are big as saucers. He asks if I can do some landscaping around his grass the next day. And I said, sure, yeah. And he gives me ten dollars and says meet me tomorrow. When he left, all I wanted to do was to run upstairs and buy more dope and get high again. But I didn’t want to spend this man’s money that way. So I ran across the street and bought lunch meat, crackers – anything so I don’t spend it on drugs.
      “That night, this guy whose staying where I’m staying, while I’m sleeping, he steals the pipes from under the sink – steals ‘em for the copper, so he can sell ‘em. And he takes off, and all the water starts running in. I wake up on the floor and the place is flooded. I’m washing away.
      “My only clothes is all ruined now, and I go to Pastor’s house and I say, ‘Sorry, I ain’t gonna be able to work for you. I’m all soaked."’ And I’m telling him how mad I am at this guy, and he says, ‘Cass, don’t worry. Sometimes people got it worse than you do.’
      “And he sends me over to the church, and he says, ‘Go upstairs, we got some bags of clothes, just pick out what you want.’ And I get some clothes – Mitch, it’s the first time I got clean underwear in I don’t know how long. Clean socks. A shirt. I go back to his place and he says, ‘Where are you gonna stay now, Cass?’
      “And I say, ‘Don’t know. My place is all flooded.’ And he goes in, talks with his wife, and he comes out and says, ‘Why don’t you stay here with us?’
      “Now I’m shocked. I mean, I did a little work for this man. I stole food from him. And now he’s opening his home?
      “He said, ‘You wanna think about it?’ And I’m like, ‘What’s there to think about? I’m homeless.’”

***

Henry never told me any of this, I said.
      “That’s why I’m telling you,” Cass said. “I moved in with his family that night. I stayed there almost a year. A year. He let me sleep on the couch in his main room. His family is upstairs, they got little kids, and I’m sayin’ to myself, this man don’t know me, he don’t know what I’m capable of. But he trusts me.”
      He shook his head and looked away.
      “That kindness saved my life.”
      We sat there for a second, quiet and cold. I now knew more than I’d ever figured to know about an elder of the I Am My Brother’s Keeper Ministry.
      What I still didn’t know was why.

***

And then Cass told me: “I see the way you watch the Pastor. You here a lot. And maybe he ain’t the way you think a pastor should be.
      “But I truly believe the Lord has given me a second chance on account of this man. When I die, Jesus will stand in the gap for me and I will be heard and the Lord will say, ‘I know you.’ And I believe it’s the same for Pastor Covington.”
      But Henry’s done some bad things in his life, I said.
      “I know it,” Cass said. “I done ‘em too. But its not me against the other guy. Its God measuring you against you.
      “Maybe all you get are chances to do good, and what little bad you do ain’t much bad at all. But because God has put you in the position where you can always do good, when you do something bad – it’s like you let God down.
      “And maybe people who only get chances to do bad, always around bad things, like us, when we finally make something good out of it, God’s happy.”
      He smiled and those stray teeth poked into his lips. And I finally realised why he had so wanted to tell me his story.
      It wasn’t about him at all.
      You really called Henry “Reb?” I asked.
      “Yeah. Why?”
      Nothing, I said.

***

“…let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven” (Matthew 5:16)

Japan

2011-04-12T18:09:00.001+08:00

It has been EIGHT years now! How time flies!

Our prayers are with you, Japan.

Introspection

2011-04-11T18:03:00.001+08:00

Introspection

2011-04-11T17:43:00.001+08:00

Have I an object, LORD, below
Which would divide my heart from Thee
Which would divert its even flow,
In answer to Thy constancy?
Oh, teach me quickly to return
And cause my heart afresh to burn!

Have I a hope, however dear
Which would defer Thy coming, LORD
Which would detain my spirit here,
Where naught can lasting joy afford?
From it, my Saviour, set me free!
To look and long and wait for Thee.

Be Thou the object, bright and fair
To fill and satisfy the heart.
My hope to meet Thee in the air
And nevermore from Thee to part;
That I may undistracted be
To follow, serve and wait for Thee.

(George West Frazer, 1830-1896)

Introspection

2011-04-11T15:25:00.002+08:00

In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength.

yet you would have none of it.

Hold me close to You.

2011-04-11T00:05:00.001+08:00

Hold me close,
Let Your Love surround me,
Bring me near; draw me to Your side.

And as I wait,
I’ll rise up like the eagle
And I will soar with You,
Your Spirit leads me on,
By the power of Your Love.

“Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the Everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary, and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 40:28-31)

Hold me O LORD, close to You. Let me feel You breathing over me, let me hear Your heartbeat.

Sometimes I grow tired, LORD; sometimes I feel like I cannot go on. Sometimes I even feel like I do not deserve to go on.

In those times, LORD, let me feel Your embrace – Your arms holding me close to You, close to Your heart. There I am whole, there I know am I whole. There, I am whole – because there is where I belong.

Grace for the day

2011-04-08T16:04:00.001+08:00

for the grace to hold fast,
for the grace to look straight ahead,
for the grace to keeping running,
for the grace to carry on.

Get some rest/Go to sleep

2011-04-08T14:08:00.001+08:00

is what I am Going to do as soon as I Get home later this Gevening (evening).

Fish in a bowl

2011-04-07T18:28:00.001+08:00

At home, there is a goldfish who lives in a fish bowl.

He kind of looks like this one, but this is not him. The one at home is fatter and the brim of his bowl is in a wave like pattern. He also looks more stuck up.

He’s not my goldfish. He is the replacement for my goldfish (and probably the 55th generation of goldfish to live in that bowl). My goldfish was just a koochi fry when I brought him home. Kok Onn gave him to me in a plastic bag and I had to talk soothingly to him in the car, or else he would have pengsaned on the bumpy ride. When I got home I put him into The Bowl and yelled into the water, “HELLO FISH FISH!”. He seemed to like the name & stopped swimming around whenever I called “HELLO FISH FISH!”

Fish Fish grew up into a bigger round ball of ….fish. One day a friend brought me a jungle fighting fish he had caught while on a camping trip. I had no other bowl, so I roomed him with Fish Fish. A week later he died. Feisty one, that Fish Fish!

Clearly he had some problems relating to society. But, how do you counsel a goldfish, right? Sensing that he was lonely in that big glass bowl, I decided to get him some plants to play with. So I got some mini lily-like plants from Yew Meng and floated them in Fish Fish’s bowl. The next day, when I got home I noticed that the bowl was empty and dried out, and my round fish ball was missing. Pops told me he’d suffocated from all the plants in his bowl. Poor fish! The very next day, he was replaced by the same stuck up fish swimming in that bowl today.

Sometimes I think about Fish Fish in the bowl. I wonder how he could be so contented swimming round and round and round the bowl every single day of his life. There would be the occasional deviation from his routine, of course. Like when the Fatty The Cat dips her paws into his water, or when someone shouts into his bowl.

Pops says fish forget easily. Maybe that’s a good life. A short life, with very few and rare stressful events. And being able to forget. No baggage. Just swim, swim, swim all day with only God as a friend.

Elephants

2011-04-07T00:54:00.001+08:00

are just absolutely the cutest things!

so are kittens and penguins and chicks and hamsters and slow lorrises and baby geckos and bunnies and hermit crabs and turtles and hedgehogs and old people and infants and baby seals and puppies and little ducklings and Elmo.

Drowsy

2011-04-05T15:59:00.001+08:00

Have you ever seen a someone so sleepy, she fainted?

I haven’t.

Maybe I should leave a video camera on somewhere on my desk just in case.

Be Consistent!

2011-04-04T17:58:00.001+08:00

I’m gonna make up for forgetting to post my B post on Saturday by doing a triple post ….chehwah.

1. Becoming Children again.

On Saturday, we had planned a youth trip to the KLCC Skybridge. Sue Ann & I went at 7.30 a.m., ahead of everyone to buy tickets, but when we got there – omg there were SO many people and the line was so long! Gilerr. But we lined up anyway, and waited half awake and grumpy. I had slept at 4 am the night before –.- Trust me, I was grumpy.

Thank God for the Mesra shop there…that sold strong coffee and overpriced hotdogs. At least we weren’t hungry. Just a bit broke, and it was just breakfast.

When we were only 1/4 way to the counter, the board showed “Now selling tickets for 1.30 p.m. visit to the skybridge” It was way too late for us, so we decided to chow. WHATS THE BIG DEAL ABOUT THE SKYBRIDGE ANYWAY? Why every time also packed one? I must commend the service at the KLCC Skybridge counter/waiting room though. Really friendly, helpful and polite guards, despite how early and packed the place was.

But kesian la, my poor yuffies…Ezra brought his binoculars some more. Haha. So we decided instead to go to Petrosains.

You know, I expected to be bored out of my skull. The last time I went to Petrosains, I was 12 or something. And even then I was bored – I remember it being about petrol and some really lame helicopter ride simulator. The only reason why we decided to go there this time round was because it costs only RM12 for adults (and RM7 if you’re under 18), compared to the gila b*b* expensive Aquaria where only infants can afford to go. Plus, Tim had been there recently (2 years ago) and recommended it.

I was wrong! Petrosains has been really keeping up with the times, and its SUPER fun! I don’t have all the pictures – they’re in Sue Ann’s camera. But here are some of them:

Here’s the Infinity Mirror where you could see up and down to forever. (Limited to “forever” at that spot in Petrosains, KLCC only though)

Here’s the Many Sides Of You mirror, where you can see many sides of you (but only if you see through a little crack at the door)

Here’s Dino from Da Hood,yo! the rapping T Rex: “Hey kawan selamat datang…” You won’t be able to get the rap out of your head.

Annnnnd….I got to go to SPACE! Hah! I also got go la, Sheikh Muszaphar!

There were games and a science show where Yew Meng won a badge that says “I had fun in Petrosains” and wore it throughout the entire trip until worship team meeting that night. We were there from about 9 a.m. till 2 p.m. and didn’t want to go home, but we were too hungry and our legs were giving way (ok, not all our legs). Petrosains is SUPER fun, guys! Even if you’re already old and have to spend your weeks quietly behind an office desk

2. Birthday Chick

Happy Birthday Sheng Mae!

We first met in 2 Usaha. She was sweeping the floor and she had the longest hair…like Rapunzel! ~~Couldn’t tell whether she was sweeping with her hair or the broom.~~ She was there, all through primary school, badminton classes, every birthday, through high school, form six, ~~in prison~~, through our uni years and now. This year marks our 16th year. Love you babe! <3

3. Buying Cheezels.

I LOVE Cheezels!

A is for…Ah Ma, I miss you.

2011-04-01T01:26:00.001+08:00

Now and then, for the most part of yesterday I found myself wondering what to start this A to Z blogging challenge with. I kept thinking “A is for Ah Ma Teh Bok Nee”.

Ah Ma was my paternal grandmother. I tried to find a picture I took picture I took with her when I was little, at a church camp in Golden Sands, PD to put up with this post– but I couldn’t find it. But I don’t need a picture to remember her. I remember everything about her.

My Ah Ma was a gentle kindly old lady, as gentle as a Nyonya could be. She took care of me, my sister and our cousin Colin for most of our young lives. She had short curly hair that she constantly dyed as it greyed and small smiley eyes. She wasn’t fat as some old women are because she’d had to work very hard to bring up her five children, but she wasn’t small either because when her children grew up they loved her and gave to her, just as she had given to them. Among her brothers and sisters, she was always highly respected and whatever she said was law, because she was very wise.

She always smelled like talcum powder and I liked leaning on her because she was soft. Her earlobes had big holes in them because she had worn heavy earrings as they did in the past. She always told me that I looked nice whenever I wore red or pink, those must have been her favourite colours. She would call my house every Tuesday and chat with whoever picked up the phone.

My earliest memory with her is of me fighting with her and pulling the gold necklace she always wore around her neck because I didn’t want to get on the school bus to go kindergarten. I also remember her threatening to rub chilli on my eyes because I had been naughty and wanted to play with a boiling kettle of water. She eventually did, rub onions on my eyes, because I played with an electrical plug and got myself electrocuted.

I remember her making me her special maggi mee, where she used a wok to cook the noodles, instead of a pot. I would ask it from her all the time. She knew what I liked to eat, and always tried to cook my favourite dishes for me. She would make me luncheon meat sandwiches in the mornings, to eat before I went to school and a cup of milo. When my mom passed away and I went to live with Ah Ma, I remember always feeling safe whenever Ah Ma was around.

On evening in 2001, Ah Ma had just taken a bus from Melaka and was waiting at the bus station for someone to pick her up when a motorcyclist snatched her handbag. The impact caused her to fall and she hit her head on the curb. She fell into a coma and three days later she died. It breaks my heart knowing that I never got down to sharing Christ with my Ah Ma and I don’t know if I’ll ever see her again. Maybe He would have revealed Himself to her. She was such a good person.

We all miss her. The other day at a family gathering/karaoke session, someone picked the song “Lagenda” by Sheila Majid. Ko Chik (small aunt) wept singing the song, she said it reminded her of Ah Ma.

Ah Ma I miss you. When you left, I sat crying at the foot of the stairs staring at the chair where you used to sit and droop off to sleep, knowing how much I would miss seeing you do that. Ah Ma, we are your legacy. You taught us to be kind to everyone, no matter how they looked or how much money they have, or even if they were unkind. You taught us to work hard and value family, that as family we must always look out for each other. You taught us that the true value of a person is not in how much they earn, or what they know or don’t know, but in they way they respect other people, in the goodness of their hearts and in the kindness they show, even to the least deserving.

The song “Lagenda” might have been written as a tribute to Tan Sri P. Ramlee. But when we sing it, we sing about you.

Sejuta bintang di angkasa
Sinarnya mempesona
Sebutir bintang di taman seni
Cahayanya berseri
Biar bertahun masa beredar
Satu wajah satu nama takkan pudar

Tetap jelas di ruang mata
Setiap gerak gaya
Bergetaran merdu sinar
Di persada budaya
Hingga kini menjadi sebutan
Tetap terpahat namamu di ingatan

Kaulah satu satunya
Di antara berjuta
Insan teristimewa
Patah tak tumbuh lagi
Hilang belum berganti
Kerana kau tersendiri
Kau kebanggaan kita
Kau budayawan bangsa
Engkau lagenda

Quack

2011-03-31T18:37:00.002+08:00

Ok. In an effort to blog again, I've joined a BLOGGING COMPETITION! All I have to do is...blog everyday about something to the day that starts with each letter of the alphabet. So means tomorrow's will be A for April.

I'll bet LOTS of people are going to name their post April. Mmphh. But not me! Na’ah!

What will my blogpost be then? Ahahhah! It's a mystery.
Since I'm probably the only one who reads this blog, since everyone else probably thinks its dead by now, I'm keeping myself in suspense. Sad, but true.

You know (self), I've been blogging for a very. long. time now. This would be my...8th year.Why haven't I been making any money out of this? Maybe I should start photographing cute colourful things, like these marshmellows I'm munching on. Mmmm mmm. :)

Feeling a little bit nostalgic, I went & dug into my past….blog. xanga.com/envyno. Hey, before blogspot, and wordpress and all that canggih manggih, xanga was IN ok.

This was my first ever post at the tender age of 16. It didn’t use to look like this at first (with all the purple flowers and all), but I couldn’t find the original template.

I sounded 16 didn't I? Hehe. I even got a comment! My first ever comment….from myself.

Alrightos. Its 6.30, time to go home! I won’t say where I’m blogging from. Hehee. Toodles! See you (me) tomorrow for an A! – not cool, I know…couldn’t come up with something wittier.

Missing Christmas

2010-12-23T23:21:00.000+08:00

You know, Christmas has always excited me. Always. I would start fussing about Christmas in July because July would mean half the year has passed, and the closer half to Christmas is here. I listen to Christmas songs, whenever.

I LOVE Christmas. I love everything about Christmas. I love the colours, red, green, gold, white, silver, gingerbread brown. I love Christmas songs. I am amazed at how there are absolutely no bad songs (by bad i mean 'bad sounding') in an entire genre when it comes to Christmas songs/music! I love the smells of Christmas, the lights, the bustling sound of people doing last minute shopping in malls, the rustling of wrappers. I love it all. I love Christmas movies, putting up plays/song performances at church/ carolling, getting inviting to sing for turkey. There's nothing about Christmas that I don't like. I may complain and whine sometimes about being stressed out and tired for all the activity during Christmas-time. But I secretly enjoy it all.

Or at least I did. Christmas is so different this year. Its the 23rd today, and I haven't done ANY shopping. There isn't a single piece of wrapping paper on my room floor. I've only been able to join the caroling group to carol -- once. I'm so disappointed. I've been looking forward to this year's Christmas since the 26th of December last year.

This sucks. :(

Ordinarily there would be packages at the foot of our Christmas tree. And I would be eyeing them, excited to open them, but telling myself to restrain till Christmas day. There would be carols playing on the radio, or at least in my head all the time. We would be rushing here and there for dinners today (the 23rd) going from house to house to carol.

They did carol. But I had to work. All through this Christmas season, I had to work. It wasn't Christmassy at work at all. Sure, we had a lunch and a gift exchange. But after that everyone just went back to their desks and worked. No carols in the background (I really wanted to play some carols, but I figured the other writers needed quiet to think, to write). My only consolation is that we have Christmas eve off. It would kill me to have to work on Christmas eve.

I'm not trying to make those who have to work on Christmas eve feel badly. Maybe this only affects me because I'm such a Christmas fanatic.

Ah well, for what its worth. May we all find Christmas, in our hearts :) Cliché I know, but true.

Merry Christmas, one and all!

Whatever is worthwhile, think about such things.

2010-11-19T10:28:00.001+08:00

Our days are few, and are far better spent in doing good, than in disputing over matters which are, at best, of minor importance. The old schoolmen did a world of mischief by their incessant discussion of subjects of no practical importance; and our Churches suffer much from petty wars over abstruse points and unimportant questions. After everything has been said that can be said, neither party is any the wiser, and therefore the discussion no more promotes knowledge than love, and it is foolish to sow in so barren a field. Questions upon points wherein Scripture is silent; upon mysteries which belong to God alone; upon prophecies of doubtful interpretation; and upon mere modes of observing human ceremonials, are all foolish, and wise men avoid them. Our business is neither to ask nor answer foolish questions, but to avoid them altogether; and if we observe the apostle’s precept (Tit_3:8) to be careful to maintain good works, we shall find ourselves far too much occupied with profitable business to take much interest in unworthy, contentious, and needless strivings.
There are, however, some questions which are the reverse of foolish, which we must not avoid, but fairly and honestly meet, such as these: Do I believe in the Lord Jesus Christ? Am I renewed in the spirit of my mind? Am I walking not after the flesh, but after the Spirit? Am I growing in grace? Does my conversation adorn the doctrine of God my Saviour? Am I looking for the coming of the Lord, and watching as a servant should do who expects his master? What more can I do for Jesus? Such enquiries as these urgently demand our attention; and if we have been at all given to cavilling, let us now turn our critical abilities to a service so much more profitable. Let us be peace-makers, and endeavour to lead others both by our precept and example, to “avoid foolish questions.”

2010-10-07T19:04:00.002+08:00

Look who's friends with me!! :D

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2010-09-11T23:38:00.001+08:00

Today we really ATE mann. Fuyoh.

And the only picture we took was with Ps. Solomon Abraham whom we bumped into and only dared to say hi to at the end.

Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp!

For ourselves, really.

2010-09-11T00:42:00.001+08:00

A week goes by at just like that *snap fingers*. Then it’ll be a month, then a year, then ten years and before you know it, your whole life.

You’ve only got one life. Do something. (Hehheh…I just HAD to.)

Selamat Hari Raya to you all!

I went to Marks and Spencers today. Said hello to the cashier while I was paying for some jam tarts I thought my dad would like. I asked him if he was going to balik kampung today, since its Raya. He said nope, he’s gotta work. I asked the same thing to the lady behind the counter at the petrol station, and the receptionist at the doctor’s clinic yesterday. Nope, they all said…gotta work! :(

Its like working on Christmas.

Thank you, Satay Man at Alisans, Cashier At Marks and Spencers, Lady Behind the Counter at Petronas, Receptionist at Klinik Medijaya and everyone else who has sacrificed being home with family to serve us today. May you have a good Raya anyway :)

Its pretty sad (myself included) how PJians have no place to go and thus, flood the malls on public holidays. We should build ourselves some fake beaches/fake highlands or something.

Disturbances

2010-09-09T02:02:00.001+08:00

I’ve shifted to the hospital store. It feels weird working in a hospital! Like, one walks into a hospital expecting to jab, or be jabbed – people go there because they’re in pain, or want to help others who are in pain – not to sell over-priced coffee!

Ah well, but here it is - I now sell over-priced coffee to people in pain, or families visiting people in pain, or others. I’ve found myself wondering, these past two days (I only started at the hospital yesterday!), what do I say to these people while trying to make conversation over the retail counter? Do I ask “Are you having a good day?”. I mean…they’re not there to shop, or hangout! They’re there because they/someone they know isn’t well, or its their job to pick at brains or drain blood and clean bed pans. Not exactly sunshine and glamour, if you ask me – well, maybe not to me at least. My hat is off to the ones who willingly, with a smile, change adult diapers, perform coffee enema on others and mend human guts!

On the bright side…its a new place for me to explore! (I accidently walked, almost into the MORGUE late Tuesday night…now, that was creepy!) I plan to wander to the paeds ward (if I get to go in) and see the babies tomorrow. Awww :) :) :) We get lots of babies at the store (when their parents get coffee for themselves). I love looking at them. The babies, that is.

When I was at One U, I was comfortable…almost to the point where I considered (if the meager salary wasn’t a factor) just doing this my whole life (I hope none of my aunts/dad/Jen/Dai May see this! :P). It was fun, I had great colleagues and everything was so accessible. PLUS I loved that I was working in One Utama! Now that I’ve been taken out of my comfort zone, I can’t wait for something more permanent (and NOT in a hospital!). Maybe this is God telling me to look ahead and that I simply cannot stay in Starbucks forever (I know…you must be thinking duhh! –who says ‘duhh anymore, anyway?!) but, well, just hanging out some linen.

Some other random stuff:

We (the Youth) are going for Steamboat-BBQ in Kepong this Saturday, and I’m really REALLYYY looking forward to it. I went once, our ex-colleagues at Fly took us there on our 2nd-last day of work…and it was WONDERFUL! (*cue angels song). The spread is amazing, and you get to barbeque and boil all your food all by yourself and there’s unlimited ice-cream and fondue and jellies annnnddd….FRIED CHICKEN WINGS!

Insert: Fried Chicken Wings! *beam

Maybe I’m just hungry now, or maybe thinking about the buffet is making me hungry.

2010-09-03T03:00:00.001+08:00

Like my chick blog? :D

Don’t read if you’re already depressed.

2010-09-03T02:15:00.001+08:00

I am starting to see ~~the~~ my world, slowly, bit by bit, for what it is. And it is not pretty. In fact, for the most part it is downright nasty – rotten to the core. Thinking about it makes me think of what happens to apples when you cut them in half and leave the insides exposed to oxygen. They turn brown and slowly start to rot.

I don’t mean to sound so negative, not especially on my ‘first day back’ after such a long hiatus. Yew Meng commented today, as I was lamenting to him about the messed up state we I am living in, “What are you a pessimist?”. Never in my life has anyone called me a pessimist. I am/was 88% Sanguine, according to the crazya**-long questionnaire we did to figure out why some are perky and some are not. Now I’m starting to wonder why no one took into account our sugar-intake.

Louie Armstrong must have been hallucinating when he sang “What a wonderful world”.

If only we would learn to be kinder, nicer, less selfish, more giving. That would help things by a mile.

Guide me home

2010-09-02T18:35:00.002+08:00

This is the air I breathe
This is the air I breathe.

Your Holy Presence living in me.

This is my daily bread
This is my daily bread.

Your very Word spoken to me;

And I, I’m DESPARATE for YOU!

And I, I’m lost without You.

The holidays are near!

2010-06-02T11:16:00.001+08:00

I woke up relatively early this morning, after a rather weird night of feeling windy and bloated :( Hot coffee this morning provided somewhat little comfort; but a little comfort is better than no comfort at all.

I am wasting time loitering around, lying on my belly as I type this. I should get up, take a bath and get ready for work. But I don’t, because a larger part of me is telling me to take it easy mann.

Met Yew Kong and Charity’s rabbit, Panda the other day. He’s really cute! I wish I had a rabbit also.

I’m presently in a rather strange phase

2010-05-30T01:09:00.001+08:00

More and more, I’m getting used to being Home. At first it was surreal. I couldn’t get my head around having a permanent residence. I sound dramatic, I know you think that. But its true! I had gotten so used to living like a nomad, out of a suitcase (more like, a laundry bag :P ), my car as a shoe closet – that I just couldn’t get it – I’m home, back where I’d left off, three years later.

Which probably explains my reluctance to clean out my room (this is just an excuse I’m making up). But I finally did, the other day. I took out my suitcase, brought it downstairs and into the storeroom.

Happy Birthday, Dude!

2010-05-15T05:29:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthday Wei Soon!

I driving from work that day and feeling all grown up, and a thought just fluttered into my mind like a butterfly in sepia and stayed there; I thought about how we used to walk home from school, and the hole in your classroom, and the times we got out our bicycles and cycled around, and about your beat-up car which you used to fetch me around with, and about how you called me after prom while sitting outside 7-11 with Paul, and how you texted me from camp in school.

Then I realised that I had forgotten bits of those times (though not the essential bits) because they were set so far back, and we were so young and so different.

And I wondered what you are like now, and if you were different, older, like I am. And I wished I knew you like I did then.

You’ve been gone so long dude! I really miss you. I’m sorry I’m not better at that whole email-msn-sms-snail mail-keeping in touch thing! :( But hurry back!

Anyway happy birthday! :) :) :) I really really miss you. Hope you’re having a FAB one there!

Love,

Yvonne

Identity

2010-02-02T04:31:00.001+08:00

Precious Lord Jesus, so near to me;
I shall find myself in Thee.

2010-01-26T20:03:00.001+08:00

Hold me down, I feel a flutter in my wings.

Brings me to my knees

2010-01-08T13:14:00.001+08:00

He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
And I realise just how beautiful You are and how
Great Your affections are for me

Oh, how He loves us so
Oh, how He loves us
How he loves us so

(John Mark McMillan)

2010-01-05T00:55:00.001+08:00

Blog and blogger revamp in progress.

Don’t go away! We’ll be right back! :D

What I’ve been up to.

2009-12-09T02:05:00.001+08:00

A few things have been keeping me busy these Yuletide holidays:

1. I had a bad toothache which I ignored for fear of the dentist, till one night it became so unbearable that in my haste to find some painkillers in the kitchen, I found only Aspirin.

2. Upon consuming the Aspirin, I discover that I am allergic to the substance and was rushed to Damansara Specialist Centre (it is a very good hospital, by the way. I highly recommend it).

3. While the Aspirin provided temporary relief for my toothache, its effect eventually wore off – leaving me with a pair of badly swollen eyes and a worse toothache, and made me quite miserable.

4. So I decided, my fear of the dentist was not worth the pain. I plucked up courage and went to see the highly esteemed Dr. Kwok who advised a three step root canal treatment.

5. Today was step two of the recommended three step root canal treatment.

6. I eat like a tortoise nowadays because of the root canal treatment.

7. Rachael took me to Wendy’s today where out of greed I ordered a Spicy Chicken and three Nuggets (because of the root canal treatment, it would take me an entire day to finish a whole burger). We sat at the outdoor seating and there I met a cross-eyed cat.

8. I offered it some of my Spicy Chicken, which it received with much gratitude. But because it looked so funny cross-eyed, I couldn’t help but laugh at it. Then it scratched me. Perhaps I offended it.

The Lord has promised good to me
His Word my hope secured
He will my Shield and Portion be
As long as life endures.

-

2009-11-12T17:12:00.001+08:00

To the craziest, most tiring, most stretching semester of my entire life; here’s to the END of it!

The feeling of relieve is indescribable.

2009-11-10T14:02:00.001+08:00

Hehehe. So cute.

Hard times.

2009-11-08T15:31:00.001+08:00

When Jesus had again crossed over by boat to the other side of the lake, a large crowd gathered around him while he was by the lake. Then one of the synagogue rulers, named Jairus, came there. Seeing Jesus, he fell at his feet and pleaded earnestly with him, "My little daughter is dying. Please come and put your hands on her so that she will be healed and live." So Jesus went with him.

A large crowd followed and pressed around him. And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, "If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed." Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, "Who touched my clothes?"

"You see the people crowding against you," his disciples answered, "and yet you can ask, 'Who touched me?' "

But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. He said to her, "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering."

While Jesus was still speaking, some men came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue ruler. "Your daughter is dead," they said. "Why bother the teacher any more?"

Ignoring what they said, Jesus told the synagogue ruler, "Don't be afraid; just believe."

He did not let anyone follow him except Peter, James and John the brother of James. When they came to the home of the synagogue ruler, Jesus saw a commotion, with people crying and wailing loudly. He went in and said to them, "Why all this commotion and wailing? The child is not dead but asleep." But they laughed at him.
After he put them all out, he took the child's father and mother and the disciples who were with him, and went in where the child was. He took her by the hand and said to her, "Talitha koum!" (which means, "Little girl, I say to you, get up!" ). Immediately the girl stood up and walked around (she was twelve years old). At this they were completely astonished.

Today Ps. Wai Ming reminded us again that, no matter what happens God is still in control.

The woman with the issue of blood had been suffering for twelve years. Year after year. doctor after doctor – and yet there was no cure for her. By this time, she would have probably gone through a number different rituals, some which would have left her scarred; consumed bitter herbs and what was medicine at that time that would have made her insides burn. Still, she would continue to bleed. Shunned by society, alone in her misery – she had no way out. Failure after failure would have traumatised her, slowly killing whatever hope she’d clung to.
She would be, what is today, a cancer victim whom, stricken with stubborn tumors – weakened after years of agonizing bouts of chemotherapy and surgery – is forced to hear doctor after doctor say “I’m sorry, we’ve done everything we could but the tumors are back. Maybe we can try something else.”
Or someone who has fallen so deep into depression, that no matter what he does he cannot get out of the war and turmoil raging on in his mind. The harder he tries, the deeper he slips back in.

The woman with the issue of blood refused to give up. She kept believing, there had to be a way out. Though she could not see it, there had to be hope. And when he came, she knew.

Jairus knew.

Hope is here.

So with whatever dignity she had left, she stepped out into a crowd who considered her filth. Ignoring their angry glares and disgusted expressions, she pushed her way through them. Nothing could stop her. Because she knew – he’s the one – her hope, her healing, her salvation.

The times have changed, but we have not. We still need hope. Jesus is our only hope.

I’ve found myself in You

2009-11-04T13:09:00.001+08:00

Did You rise the sun for me?
Or paint a million stars that I might
Know Your majesty?

Is Your voice upon the wind?
Is everything I've known marked
With my Maker's fingerprints?

Breathe on me
Let me see Your face
Ever I will seek You

'Cause all You are is all I want. Always
Draw me close in Your arms
Oh God, I wanna be with You

Can I feel You in the rain?
Abandon all I am to have You
Capture me again
Let the earth resound with praise
Can You hear as all creation lives
To glorify one Name?

Good morning, sunshine :)

Nevermind la.

2009-11-02T14:27:00.001+08:00

Today I wore to the exam hall the SAME outfit I wore to CHURCH yesterday – a black tank top WITH SEELVES and loose striped slacks. I pulled on a long pink cardi over these and thought I looked pretty decent. The only skin I allowed exposed was the skin of my neck, face and hands.

Upon entering the hall, I had barely sat down when a short man donning a songkok came up to me and said, in no distinguished manner, “You tak tau ke, regulasi pemakaian peperiksaan? Ini macam pakai pergi disco!” and proceeded to make me fill in a red form warning me to never again enter the exam hall, scantily clad. Apparently he could see my arms through the sleeves of my cardigan.

In these times, I want to yell “WHAT THE HECK?!” and throw a fork or a pen. But instead, I think I should say, “Nevermind la”, and turn the other cheek. Sigh.

Mew

2009-10-28T23:47:00.001+08:00

Look who we met at the orchard!

(Stole this pic from Rach. Hope you don’t mind! I couldn’t help it, she’s so cute!)

No ham?

2009-10-27T01:57:00.004+08:00

Decided to make myself a healthy-diet-exam-stay-at-home-save-money kit, which basically are ingredients for ham sandwiches and some fruits. Not trusting Kajang Giant to have ham in their stock (I was right), I went to Tesco thinking, you know, Tesco is from the UK. UK people eat ham all the time.

Ham ham ham.

So I walked around Tesco looking out for a nice sales lady behind a cold cuts counter who would timbang some ham for me, like the one in the KJ Giant Mall. I walked round and round until people started looking at me, still I could not find any ham.

I suppose people were looking at me because after awhile I had a frown on my face. I just could not believe there isn't any ham in TESCO! Hmmph.

I refused to give up - so I asked the cashier at the bakery section, "Excuse me, nak tanya sikit...kat sini ada jual ham tak?" (How do you say ham in BM?) He just looked at me and then after awhile pointed to his lady colleague standing nearby, "Tanya dia".

Ok.

I posed the same question, "Kak, kat sini ada ham tak?"

She said, "Ham? Hamburger?"

I gave up. Kat Tesco Kajang memang takde ham.

Hang on.

2009-10-15T19:10:00.001+08:00

Some days (like today), I feel like dropping everything and running away.

But something always tells me to keep going.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIE! ♥

2009-10-14T09:21:00.001+08:00

It’s weird without you :(

Love you babe, come back soon!

I ♥

2009-10-14T02:28:00.001+08:00

Travelling on a bus at night.
Stopping at rest stops in the wee hours of the morning.
Sitting in an airplane as it takes off from the ground and as it lands.
Snuggling up in bed with a mug of hot coffee and a good on a rainy day.
Having dinner al fresco in the evening, just before the sun sets and it’s windy.
Cosy home-cooked dinners with my best friends and jazz music playing in the background.
Swings.
The sea.
Hotels.
The way libraries smell.
All kinds of flowers.
Zoos and aquatic parks.
Sleeping in.
Breakfast.
Taking walks when it’s windy.
CHRISTMAS!
Cold, rainy days.
Cendol on rainy days.
Quiet day-offs.
Camping and river hiking up to the waterfall.
Lakesides.
Picnics when it’s not hot out.
Kittens :)
Cranberry muffins.
Talking to Mr. God while watching the sun rise in the morning.

How to demolish a stronghold.

2009-10-09T00:04:00.001+08:00

1. Identify the wrong argument or pretension that establishes itself against God. Identify what is wrong with it.

2. Identify the ways the stronghold has become established – through the flesh, desire, society, or the devil. Read 1 John 4: 1-6 about testing the spirits.
Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.
This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God: Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God,but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world.
You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. They are from the world and therefore speak from the viewpoint of the world, and the world listens to them. We are from God, and whoever knows God listens to us; but whoever is not from God does not listen to us. This is how we recognize the Spirit of truth and the spirit of falsehood. (1 John 4: 1-6)

3. Identify the spiritual weapons for the warfare, in contrast to the worldly solutions.

4. Declare war on the thought or pretension that positions itself against the knowledge of Christ by -
a. Using thoughts or arguments from the Word;
b. Claiming the mind of Christ;
c. Using spiritual weapons (see Eph 6:11-17- truth, righteousness,readiness, faith, salvation, the Word of God), followed by asking for the power of the Spirit through prayer.
d. Boldly making the truth of the gospel clear (see Eph 6:19)
e. Claiming the victory by faith.
Remember, “the One who is in you is greater that the one who is in the world” (1 John 4:4)
Christ has defeated Satan and has spoiled all of the principalities.

5. Win the victory promised in 1 John 5:2-3, 18-20 by -
a. Loving God.
b. Keeping His commands.
c. Being sure that you are born of God.
d. Believing that Jesus is God’s Son.
e. Believing that because God keeps you safe, the evil one cannot harm you.

(Masterlife: The Disciple’s Victory, Day 5)

Lazarus come forth!

2009-10-08T01:02:00.001+08:00

Watch and listen to this young man giving his testimony before being baptized. Read also what Sue Ann writes about what it means to be called, like Lazarus - out of death and decay, and to be given a second chance to life.

The discipline of freedom.

2009-10-06T20:49:00.001+08:00

…and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. (2 Cor 3:17)

“As I sit here in the window of this cottage, I can see a sailboat skimming silently along the horizon. It is a beautiful image of freedom. But the freedom of the sailboat to move so swiftly and beautifully is the result of of obedience to laws.The builder of the boat had to know the proper ratio of beam to keel to mast. The one who sails the boat obeys the rules of sailing. A ship tacking against the wind moves deviously, but when she runs with a strong tide or a following wind she takes to herself the power of tide and wind and they become her own. She is doing the thing she was made for. She is free not by disobeying the rules but by obeying them

Modern highways are often called freeways, but how much freedom of movement would there be if each driver were encouraged to choose any lane, any speed, any direction that happened to appeal to his fancy at the moment?

I noticed on Boston Common a sign saying “Please,” which the public was expected to understand was short for “Please keep off the grass.” Almost everybody had obeyed that sign and that’s why there was still some grass. But there were a few people sitting on the grass in defiance of the sign. Their freedom to sit on the grass instead of on bare dirt was dependant on the majority’s having denied themselves the privilege. The majority had made a choice to allow grass to grow. Their choice meant restriction, a willingness to limit themselves to the walks. It meant not doing what they wanted to do in order to have something they wanted more. The freedom of the few was bought at the sacrifice of many.

This is the crux of the question of liberty and liberation. Does it mean casting off all restrictions? (Could a ship sail without them?) Does it mean doing what we feel like doing and not doing what we don’t?

It means discipline. It means doing the things we were meant for. What is it to which we are called, we women under God?”

- Elisabeth Elliot, ‘Let me be a woman’.

Blessed are they whose ways are blameless,
who walk according to the laws of the Lord.

Blessed are they who keep His statutes,
who seek Him with all their heart.

They do nothing wrong;
they walk in His ways.

You have laid down percepts
that are to be fully obeyed.

Oh, that my ways were steadfast
in obeying Your decrees!

Then I would not be put to shame
when I consider all Your commands.

I will praise You with an upright heart
as I learn Your righteous laws.

I will obey Your decrees;
do not utterly forsake me.

(Psalm 119:1-8)

One just like Yours.

2009-10-01T22:34:00.001+08:00

I’m feeling a little bit overwhelmed. There are too many things to do, too many people to deal with and attend to and I’m a bit too tired.
My prayer is not that You would take it all away. I thank You that You have given me work, because it teaches me that I need You.
My prayer is that You would give me a pure heart, that You would make me a light bulb, just the glass part, and You be the tungsten -that You would shine in me and through me.
Help me to love, not as I know how to love, but to love them as You love them. I know You love them, furiously, and Your Heart aches for them. Help me to love them like that.
Help me to be patient and kind, even when it doesn’t make any sense to be. Especially then.

Most of all, help me to be faithful. And to be faithful only to You. Then everything else will be an overflow of what it means to be with You. Because You are everything.

Give me a pure heart, one just like Yours
I can serve You with each day
With no distractions,
My words and my actions
Will magnify Your Name
In everything that I do
I want to glorify You
Give me a pure heart, one just like Your heart
Give me a pure heart I pray.

;)

2009-09-29T00:29:00.001+08:00

♥

How was your day, sugar?

FattyCat

2009-09-25T02:09:00.001+08:00

Dear FattyCat,

You were a crazy character. But I know you loved us, which makes things worse. I’m sorry for what we did to you. I hope you know we loved you too. And I hope you’re safe, wherever you are.

I miss you.

Malaysia Day, 16 Sept 1963

2009-09-16T12:22:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthday, Malaysia! :)

I love youuuuuuuuuu!

Lets not pray empty prayers.

2009-09-14T01:00:00.003+08:00

The oppression against the Penan tribe has been known to us for a long time. They have, for many years, protested against the logging of their forests, which is their main source of livelihood, but they are powerless against the Government backed logging projects. Then they cried out to us for help, because the exploitation of their natural resources has cut off their food supply. They are starving. They have time and again reported rape and sexual molestation of their women, but it has fallen on ear-phone plugged ears. They have pleaded with the Government to provide them with transportation for their children to go to school located hours away from their villages, but no help has been sent, placing them at the mercy of timber lorry drivers. We hear their cry at a distance, but we are too caught up with our own music to really pay attention.

Read the article published last year below. The crimes the logging companies have committed against them are atrocious. They have robbed them of their basic rights as human beings. But by not responding to their desperate cries for help, by sitting white-washed, fat and rich upon our wallets, we are just as bad.

The Star, Monday October 6 2008 : Violated By Loggers

By HILARY CHIEW

Pictures by SIA HONG KIAU

Teenage schoolgirls have become the latest target of unscrupulous timber workers.

BLOCKADES have sprung up again in middle Baram in the midst of the padi planting season in interior Sarawak.

Several Penan communities have abandoned the padi fields to put up symbolic barricades - flimsy wooden gates across logging roads - to stop encroachment into the last stretch of remaining ancestral forest in a region that has seen extensive logging over the last 25 years.

The once-nomadic tribe, noted for their unwavering rejection of logging on their territory and synonymous with blockades since the late 1980s, is fighting a losing battle against the Government-backed timber industry.

At grave risk : Young Penan women bathing and washing in a polluted river next to their sett lement. As the Penan communities in middle Baram struggle to stave off the continuous destruction of their ancestr al lands by logging firms, their womenfolk are being victimised by timber company workers.

Yet another sinister threat has crept into the remote communities €“ Penan women, especially the young ones, are preyed on by workers from logging companies.

About three weeks ago, a media release by non-governmental organisation Bruno Manser Foundation (BMF) brought to light a long-held concern €“ the sexual abuse of Penan women.

The Swiss group charged that workers from two timber companies were preying on Penan women in the various settlements within the companies’ operation areas, and targeting female students who relied on the companies’ transportation service to get to school.

Students from middle Baram are boarders in secondary schools in the interior towns of Long Lama and Long San, which could take up to a week to travel on foot from their villages. The Baram district in Miri division is almost as big as the state of Perak.

The allegations were flatly denied by Deputy Chief Minister Tan Sri Alfred Jabu who dismissed the NGO’s claims as baseless. Jabu, who is also Rural Development Minister, challenged BMF to name the villages otherwise “it would be a waste of time to investigate”.

Largely ignorant of their rights and not well-versed in criminal law, the Penans have long suffered the transgression against their womenfolk in silence.

The problem is further compounded by stigmatisation associated with rape in the predominantly Christian communities.

Sexual violations

A visit to several villages reveals the prevalence of sexual abuse since the advent of commercial logging. Village leaders who readily air their grouses of hardship brought by logging are hesitant to talk about the sexual exploitation by workers from nearby logging camps.

Bulan Laing, a female elder of Long Pakan claims that violation of the women began around 1996 when a logging company began operation in middle Baram.

Nonetheless, at Long Pakan, Bulan Laing, a female elder claims that violation of the women began around 1996 when a Miri-based logging company arrived.

“There have been three pregnancies so far; the last one was in 2006. In one case, the woman married the Indonesian worker who violated her but was later divorced after she was sexually abused by another worker,” recalls Bulan.

Asked if the cases were reported to the police, Bulan appears not to know that rape is a criminal offence.

“We complained to the camp manager. He assured us that they would take action against their men but we’re still suffering.”

Her husband, headman Pada Jutang, says: “We’ve lost hope in the police taking any action. So we stopped going to them.”

The village’s nearest neighbour, Long Item €“ two hours’ drive away €“ faces a similar predicament. Headman Balan Jon reveals the modus operandi of unscrupulous timber workers.

He says the workers come to the village in small groups of not more than five, either on motorcycle or by company vehicle, with alcoholic drinks and entice the young men to join them for drinking binges at night.

“They become bold after several drinks and will coax our boys to bring them to houses with young women or girls.

Long Pakan headman Pada Jutang says his people lost hope in police taking any action and stopped going to them.

“Or they bring along instant noodles and persuade the victims to cook them a meal on the pretext that they have not yet had dinner. They then hang around and wait for the chance to strike after other occupants of the house turn in for the night,” adds Balan.

Bulan explains that young Penan men are curious about “anything from the cities” and are easily influenced despite advice by village leaders to be wary of these outsiders. She also suspects that the victims could have been drugged.

Balan laments that complaints to the company’s managers on the ground are not taken seriously.

“There are always new workers showing up. They are also good at covering their tracks and the camp manager refuses to investigate or take action,” he says dejectedly. Like Pada, Balan says he has given up on the police.

Further north in the Apoh region, Long Belok’s headman Alah Beling recalls no less than four cases of sexual violation. The latest incident resulted in a baby born last December. He reckons that the known numbers could just be the tip of the iceberg. Victims who do not end up with unwanted pregnancies may choose to remain silent to hide their shame.

Easy targets

It appears that schoolgirls are the latest to be preyed upon, according to villagers at Long Kawi, next to Long Item. They complain that timber workers come to the village during the day to identify the young girls and return later at night to carry out their plans. The harassment gets worse during the school holidays when the girls are around.

But the latest revelation of female students being made to stay overnight in logging camps, thus exposing them to sexual abuse, has plunged the Penan community into despair.

The Penans have abandoned their nomadic lifestyle so that their young ones could get an education and have a better life.

“If we don’t send our children to school, we are blamed. But providing them transportation is beyond our ability. We are at the mercy of the timber companies. We’ve to beg them to ferry our children to the secondary schools which are far away.

“I walk my younger children to Long Kevok (a four-hour drive away) to attend primary school. This problem was discussed at the school’s parent-teacher association meetings a few years ago. The school asked us to get help from the Government. There were promises but we’re still waiting,” says Galang Jutang, Pada’s younger brother.

Principal of SMK Long Lama, Ng Cheng Soo, acknowledges that transportation remains a huge problem for Penan students who make up about 12% of the 945 pupils.

“We put in a proposal for a transport allocation in 2006 to the Resident Office in Miri,” says Ng. Resident Ose Murang could not be reached for comment on the status of the proposal.

Ng adds that Penan students are catching up in their studies as shown by their better examination results and lower dropout rates.

“We hold special remedial classes and show them that we care for them. They appreciate it and they like coming to school. Penan kids are the first to volunteer for any gotong-royong events,” Ng says, adding that being rather timid, Penan students are easily bullied.

Instances of students trekking in the jungle for days to get to school and even missing major examinations when company transportation fails to materialise, are common. Hitching a ride by the side of dusty logging roads makes teenage girls especially vulnerable.

Following recent publicity of the alleged sexual abuse of Penan women in the local media, Sarawak Police Commissioner Datuk Mohmad Salleh says the force needs a police report to be lodged to facilitate investigations.

Dismayed by the police response, the Women’s Centre for Change pointed out that according to the Child Act 2001, the authorities must take action if they suspect child sexual abuse has taken place. Under the Act, anyone below the age of 18 is a child.

The Women, Family and Community Development Ministry and the Human Rights Commission have announced that they will investigate the claims.

Home.

2009-09-13T00:03:00.004+08:00

Fuh. It's been a full day man. One activity after another, only stopped for chicken rice - very nice :)

But I'm glad to be home. This is what it's like to be home.

Sometimes its a bit too much. Run here, run here. No time to stop, think and be alone, not like in uni. But I wouldn't have it any other way. I love it here! I love the sights, the sounds, the smells, the taste of PJ. PJ tastes like cranberry muffins.

Though I guess once uni ends (and with it, Kajang will end for me too), I would have to learn to create pauses for myself, because pauses are really good. One should not do without pauses.

LYPG today was awesome. We continued the plowing work, it's not over yet. But we're getting there! I can just feel it...we're getting there! Soon! Soon! Keep it up, comrates. Don't back down! Press on! We'll see it in no time.

Went for Joshua Chua's birthday party, and I'm really glad we did.

Happy Birthday Joshua!

May the Lord bless you and keep you. May He cause His face to shine upon you, and give you peace :)

FY is getting married next week! The First among us! Congrats! Wowwow!! :) Exciting!

7 days to Raya! Better makan puas-puas while the Ramadan Bazaars are still in town. After that we'd have to wait a whole year!

Apalah

2009-09-11T15:45:00.000+08:00

8 pages on ‘Demokrasi dan Masyarakat Sivil : Satu perbandingan antara peranan media di Malaysia dan media di negara serantau’ in one hour. Will I make it?

Probably not.

There’ll be homework this weekend, then :(

Windows Live Writer!

2009-09-10T16:16:00.002+08:00

Woo hoo!

I keep reading about how chuntothemoon Live Writer is, and thought I’d try it out for myself – hey!I’m blogging from Live Writer! This way, I don’t have to wait for ‘toopid Blogspot to load, which takes a million years!

It’s very hot today, so my wash dried fast and easy. We have a 10 page essay due tomorrow, which I have not started AND Dr. Megat insists that we have to present our film review today. Sheesh. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked.

Went to read and have dinner by myself [ :( ] @the New Delifrance behind PKNS yesterday. And I was the ONLY customer when I went in, and the only customer when I came out. Service was good, because I was the only customer. They gave me a HUGE piece of soft garlic baguette to eat with my Beef Bolognese [ :) ] –maybe because no one else eat; and the waiter who served me was cute. Hehe. [ :P ]

The Cappuccino there is really yummy! and comes in a huge mug. Halfway through dinner I realised the mug they used for my cappuccino was the same one they used for my mushroom soup. Haha. + a cookie + a date. (Kurma la, not ~~cute waiter~~ I hope Mr. Lee does not read this. [ :P ]

It’s FRIDAY tomorrow! And I’m going home!! :) Yayayayayayayayayayyy!

TTYL! Chao the Mao ;)

2009-09-08T00:05:00.001+08:00

Life is like a hot bath - the longer you stay in it, the more wrinkled you get.

We gotta get mooovin' !

2009-09-02T22:38:00.003+08:00

Something Jessica Kan shared - We need each other, all of us to lift up Malaysia to the Lord. So let's not give up! Let's press on, push forward and fight the good fight till we see change!

For He is about to do, in our days - "something we would not believe, even if we were told". (Hab1:5)

Make ready your hearts,

Make ready your homes,

Make ready the people of God

Prepare the way!

Today I...

2009-08-24T00:51:00.005+08:00

Went to church in the morning. Thank You for a wonderful time, Lord :)

Sat down on the landing in front of the entrance with Inkkie and Jack, and let them brainwash me.

Had kopi ais with Lisa, Yeuwks, James and Mr. Lee. Couldn't finish my cuppa, so I gave Mr. Lee the rest. Cost RM 1.50.

Accompanied Lisa to Tmn. Megah to sign for her *ehhem* grey new toy. There were a lot of papers to sign. We perah-ed freegifts out of the salesman, till we couldn't think of anything else to ask for.

Had limau madu ais at the Old Town Kopi Tiam, which cost RM 3.60. CRAZY EXPENSIVE RIGHT? ...I contradict myself. I keep saying it, but I keep going back there.

After helping to load and unload some children's books, went to KL with Mr. Lee. RELA workers were catching foreigners and cramming and shoving them into trucks; like dogs being sent to the pound. It was hot enough outside, imagine what it was like inside the truck. I saw it as an abuse of power of the part of the RELA, and a violation of the basic human rights of the foreigners - unfair, because the foreigners were helpless. I was saddened and wondered what I could do, what we all could do to change things.

Made friends with the purse salesman in KL Sentral, who told me he's eaten crocodile and elephant meat, and monkey's brains out of a monkey while it's still alive. He says the shop's in Pudu. It's too much. I'm going to report this to SPCA.

Had dinner out of a bento box, and then Mr. Lee and I watched UP!. In 3-D! We had to wear some special reflective glasses to see the 3-D effects. Coolness to fullness!

*Some people in front of us snuck in and ate some Ohmygosh-smelly-until-can-faint something disgusting. It smelt like this - imagine a cross between chow-tow-foo, sweaty feet that have been in a shoe for too long and herbal chicken soup. It smelt like that, and I suspect that was what it was. I couldn't take the stink - yes, stink - after awhile, so I whispered as gently and politely as I could, without gagging, "Excuse me, the smell from the stuff you're eating is really strong. Do you mind not eating it here?" And the guy replied "Ok, ok". Hmmmph! Inconsiderate AND rude! We should have (would have) reported them, had we not (too) snuck in Krispy Kreme. But Krispy Kreme does NOT emit a pungent odour!

After Mr. Lee had enough of looking at cameras, we had coffee in Austin Chase in Pavillion. Cynthia and Goh said we should. So we did. I recommend the iced cappuccino! Yums! :)

Bought bread which was going cheap (because they were about to close) from Bread Talk. 5 breads for RM 10!

There were people throwing coconuts on the street in Brickfields. At 11 pm! Made friends with an Aunty standing nearby who told me it was a hindu god's birthday. I don't understand the throwing coconuts part though.

Got home, washed my face and blogged about today.

Lord I'm amazed by You, how You love me.

2009-08-21T00:39:00.010+08:00

One night, I dreamt I was walking along a hillside with Jesus. The weather was perfect, the sky was blue and the air was cool; and Jesus and I were walking hand in hand, talking like the best and oldest of friends. We stopped at a tree with some big rocks under it and sat down, still talking. Jesus was listening with great interest to the things I had to say. Halfway talking to Jesus, I looked up and saw in a distance, someone I knew. All of a sudden I felt a sudden compulsion to run up to that person to talk to him, and so I did. But, while telling that person what I felt I had to so urgently convey, I felt convicted and with my head hung I went back to Jesus and said "Lord, I'm sorry for running off like that, it was so rude of me". Jesus looked at me, and said "It's ok. Come, let's try again".

So we got up from our rocks, and continued on our stroll, walking and talking as we had before. As usual, I did more of the talking, hardly allowing Jesus to say anything. But He listened patiently, and paid great interest in what I had to say.After a short while, I looked up, and was again distracted by what I saw - a friend in a distance. And just as before, I felt a sudden urge to run up to that person, thus again interrupting my conversation with the Lord. And as before, halfway, I realized my rudeness and went back to Jesus to apologize. As before, He said, "It's ok. Come, let's try again".

The scenario repeated itself again and again. I would run off suddenly and run back to Him in repentance and He would say "It's ok. Come, let's try again" Each time I ran off, Jesus would stay where we were, waiting for me to come back.

After some time, the day turned into evening, and the sky had grown dark. I noticed this while talking to the friend I had run off to. As before, I went back to Jesus, but this time knowing that our day together was drawing to an end, I was grieved and cried "Lord, I'm so sorry. Please teach me to be undistracted!". At this, Jesus looked at me, and loving me unconditionally, despite everything that I'd done, He said "It's okay. Let's try again tomorrow".

====================

Jesus, Beautiful Saviour

God of all majesty

Risen King

Lamb of God

Holy and Righteous

Blessed Redeemer

Bright Morning Star

All the heavens shout Your Praise

All creation bows to worship You

How wonderful, how beautiful

Name above every name

Exalted high!

How wonderful, how beautiful

Jesus Your Name

Name above every name

Jesus

---------

Lord I'm amazed by You, how You love me.

Interview with Peter the Vampire.

2009-08-11T01:23:00.005+08:00

Some time ago, Patrick Teoh, on Midnight Magic on Radio 4 interviewed a guy who claims he is a real-life vampire living and working in Malaysia.

Haha.

Listen to the interview here. What a cookie.

"...vampires procreate, and have little vampires."

"Blood is very good for you-full of iron"

"Falling in love would not help me, and certainly would not help the person I fell in love with"

"...I find it a very insulting comment to say I have a psychological defect! I have no psychological defect."

Day 17 : Church helping the migrant people in Malaysia

2009-08-07T13:08:00.004+08:00

"In war,

the strong make slaves of the weak,

and in peace the rich make slaves of the poor.

We must work to live, and they give us such mean wages that we die.

We toil for them all day long,

and they heap up gold in their coffers,

and our children fade away before their time,

and the faces of those we love become hard and evil.

We tread out grapes, and another drinks the wine.

We sow the corn, and our own board is empty.

We have chains, though no eye beholds them;

and we are slaves, though men call us free."

The Weaver,

The Young King

In these 40 days of prayer and fasting, let us remember the downtrodden and do good. Let us see the poor and needy and show kindness and love.

work work work

2009-07-30T22:19:00.001+08:00

Tune in to www.ukm.my/midas

I cannot remain neutral about issues of morality

2009-07-20T17:15:00.004+08:00

By Goh Keat Peng
www.themicahmandate.org/2009/07/i-cannot-remain-neutral-about-issues-of-morality/

As a Christian, I cannot keep to my seat, or shut my mouth and stay neutral over issues of morality.

So I emerge today from my several months of silence and non-involvement to say that what transpired yesterday is immoral, unacceptable and unconscionable.

Why was a witness being held for questioning for ten hours and only released at 3.45am? What kind of case is it and what is the urgency of the case in question that the witness had to be deprived of sleep and forcibly kept awake till 3.45am? Was the nation deemed to be in grave danger had the witness in question been sent home at a respectable time and asked to report again for questioning the next morning?

The nation could endure long years of waiting over so many other much longer pending cases involving so much more public money and have much greater weight in public interest but this particular case could not wait for the next morning when the witness in question would have been fresher and better rested?

What kind of interrogation was he subjected to on the fateful night without end? Why was it that a witness had to be isolated from his lawyer and forced to be in the sole company of officers with no other neutral person/s present? Because he was in the sole company of officers who were interrogating him, how would his side of the story be ever told? And how would, why should the officers in question be trusted when they tell the nation what actually transpired during that fateful night the witness lost his life?

There were no other witness/es present so how would these officers in question clear their own involvement or clear their own names in this sad story?

Isn’t it true that a medical doctor should carry out the examination of a patient of the opposite sex in the presence of at least one other person? This is a wise procedure so that should any allegation of wrongful conduct be raised against him or her, the doctor would have some neutral testimony to defend him or her.

There have been too many instances of contravention against natural justice in this country involving the agencies and instruments of state. There have been too many victims. The neutrality of these instruments of state is questionable.

I CANNOT REMAIN NEUTRAL ABOUT ISSUES OF MORALITY.

This is not about partisan politics. I expect my friends from both sides of the parliamentary divide to speak up. I expect to hear from all political parties and all who hold public office at all levels to speak up. I want especially to hear from Maximus Ongkili, Bernard Dompok, Lee Hwa Beng, Loh Seng Kok who publicly profess the Christian Faith to speak up.

I expect the churches and the church leadership to speak up including those I know personally such as Hwa Yung, Ng Moon Hing and many others.

Of course all of the above persons should state their own views and even fault my manner of speaking or reasoning. But silence is not an option. Leaders do not have the option of keeping their opinion to themselves. They must lend their voices to voices which have been silenced.

A young life has been lost on the very eve of his wedding. Siblings, parents, colleagues and a fiancee are in inconsolable grief. WHY SO? WHO WILL BE NEXT?

Originally published on July 17, 2009 in onGOHing by Goh Keat Peng.

Borrowed from http://edwardleepj.blogspot.com/

G'nite, sugar

2009-07-10T00:53:00.006+08:00

When I start eating like this, I know it's coming.

It's been the First Week. And I've been getting a lot of exercise, brisk walking around the campus looking for lecturers, trying to take just the right subject at just the right time because my class times keep clashing, because I'm taking too many subjects.
Much thanks be to Father in Heaven for letting me take the subject I really wanted to take. I almost didn't get to. But nothing is too difficult for my tycoon Dad up there. :)

Meeting my old friends again - the used bookstore and Nescafe cafe - has been greatly comforting. I shall hit the pool soon.

While cleaning out our mini-room on Monday, I found a dead cockroach under my bed. It has been there, dead, for so long that when I tried to sweep its (yech) rotting shell onto a dustpan with a broom, it quite literally just fell apart. There was nothing left of its body to hold its head, feelers, legs and (shudder) wings together. I am still trying to recover from the fact that a cockroach has been decaying under my very being for a WHOLE SEMESTER!!!

Urgh. *Shudder.

===========

We (Mich and I) have changed the decor of our mini-room. We've arranged our beds and tables to form a square and we now have a small space in the middle where we can put a rug and dance about, or sit down and talk nonsense if we wanted to. So much space for activities! This is what I call optimizing space; and I can't imagine why we didn't think of this arrangement before!!!

Mich says it's because we were "saving it for this year".

We have some new neighbours too! Some of them are pretty dodgy, though. The ones living next to us are ok - nice, quiet, respectful boys studying at the vocational school near here. The ones staying in the lot opposite to ours, however, keep waving at us (they can see through mine and Mich's windows into our room). It doesn't help that our windows are pretty huge. So now we keep our curtains drawn most of the time.
Because of them, I was at first a little apprehensive to hoist my colours, if you know what I mean. But then I thought to myself, "why should I let a couple of itchy, bored boys keep me from wearing clean underwear?!". At present, our room is as colourful as ever. :D

So, I've reached Friday (phew!). And to think it's only been the first week! As He has been reminding me over and over again during the holidays; I gotta hold on tight to the True Source, to Him, Jesus.
He will carry me through
Until the battle's done
and the victory is won
My God will carry me through.

Things are moving pretty slowly. Slow like snail. But maybe sometimes slow is good. Good is steady. Steady is snail. Slow is steady.
Slow and steady :)

Haha.
Well, hello weekend! I've waited a whole week for you!

-------------------------------------------------

He said, "G'nite, sugar". Hehe :)

A new beginning.

2009-07-05T23:31:00.003+08:00

"...the Lord has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes". (Psalm 118:23)

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
"Blessed be Your Glorious Name".

2009-07-05T00:52:00.002+08:00

Let the redeemed of the Lord say so!

2009-06-29T00:49:00.006+08:00

What does it mean to be saved?
Isn’t it more than just a prayer to pray?
More than just a way to Heaven.
What does it mean to be His?
To be formed in His likeness?
And know that we have a purpose.

To be salt and light in the world, in the world
To be salt and light in the world

Let the redeemed of the Lord say so
Let the redeemed of the Lord say so
Let the redeemed of the Lord say so
Say so, say so

Oh that the church would arise
Oh that we would see with Jesus’ eyes
We could show the world Heaven
Show what it means to be His
To be formed in His likeness
Show them the love from His fullness

Let the redeemed of the Lord rise up
Let the redeemed of the Lord rise up
Let the redeemed of the Lord rise up
Rise up, rise up!

I am redeemed!

some new and old things.

2009-06-23T01:52:00.006+08:00

It's durian season now.

There's a whole longgok of durian in a sack from Suateng downstairs. I can smell them from here, but I haven't touched any. I've been waiting, wanting this, Durian Season, since February. But now that it's here, I find that I don't really want it anymore.

It's funny how that happens, isn't it? We imagine something to be thoroughly amazing when we don't have it, even adding in our own 'bits of nice' to it, but when we have it for real, we find that we're unable to truly menghayati because we've used up everything on the imaginary.

My Papa tells me to "Learn to spend wisely".

In recent times, Sue Ann, Stephy and I went on a food fast, and then on a food fest in Seremban, Melaka and then Kluang; where we had (no meals and then) many meals in a single meal. :D
Many thanks to God, Colin, Makkoh, Cathy, Tim, Jules, Wai Yan, Isaac, Paulus, Joan, Joy, aunty and uncle Lee and Abigail for making it all so memorable for us :) We shall do it again!

Lydia + Li Yit = LyYit or LiDia soon. Boy oh boy, do I love weddings!! :)

Am currently waiting still (I almost always am, aren't I?) may it be for not too much longer ...anyhow, I bet I'll learn treasures from this. Am slightly nervous; so please Lord, teach me to trust You more and cling on to that trust, or rather to You.
And to you
Who are waiting too,
Be of stout heart, Dear One
Because I know; if I were to know anything it would be this : That He loves us and He will walk us to the end, wherever that end may be.

Everyday conversations

2009-05-29T03:26:00.003+08:00

p [i] n g. says:
my pimples getting worse la :( :( :(
Schmae says:
stop touching it!
sue yin says:
yea stop touching it!
sue yin says:
wanna go for facial anot?
sue yin says:
yea, he looks kwai lo
.p [i] n g. says:
yar..nice nose!!
.p [i] n g. says:
i want nose job.hahahah
Schmae says:
...

This is what I've had to put up with the past 14 years.

Atag!

2009-05-28T23:14:00.005+08:00

This was actually from Facebook, but i shy la so many people see :P So I copied and pasted it here :)

==========================

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
My bellybutton :D
No la, my hair. That's head hair.

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
White. But I lost that hoodie :(

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Yes! :)

4. Do you plan outfits?
Haha. Yes. :P

5. What's the biggest thing you can throw?
My sister. Into the longkang. Hahahaha

6. What's the closest thing to you that's red?
The muruku container cover.

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
I dreamt I got a tattoo, and it was super painful getting it. (Don't ask me why I dreamt about getting a tattoo)

8. Did you meet anybody new today?
Yes! Isaac's little brother, Paulus.

9. What are you craving right now?
Vade (pronounced VA-Deh)

10. What's your favorite scary movie?
Event Horizon.

11. What comes to mind when i say Cabbage?
My sister ('s hair). Hahahaha

12. Are you emotional?
No, not really.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
Got, with a calculator.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
I lick then bite.

15. Do you like your hair?
Yes!

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
Sure! I would love to ask him what he thought of the movie White Chicks.

18. What are you listening to right now?
MSN alerts.

19. Are your parents strict?
Nope. Not really.

20. Would you go sky diving?
Eeee, no! I'm afraid of heights! ...But, well, if it was free of charge I think I would.

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
Yum! (er..what's cottage cheese?)

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
I was Paul Moss yesterday in the line to buy movie tickets in GSC!

23. Do you rent movies often?
I used to, when that was in. Before I knew how to download movies. :P

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
Yes. But I won't tell you what.

25. How many countries have you visited?
3.

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
Haha, yes! To Cikgu Khalil in Standard 6. (yikes, I hope Cikgu Khalil doesn't read my blog!)

27. Ever been on a train?
Yeap!

28. Brown or white eggs?
Brown (what are white eggs? duck eggs r?)

29. Why not hardboiled?
Why hardboiled?

30. Do you use chop sticks?
Yeap.

31. Do you own a gun?
I got gun.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
You asked already lah. Yes.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
Bunny.

34. Are you too forgiving?
I hope so.

35. Ever been in love?
Yeap :)

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
She's going to study because she got exam.

37. Ever have cream puffs?
Yes! I like! :)

38. Last time you cried?
Monday :(

39. What was the last question you asked?
"You wanna come up and hang in my room?" Heheheh. sounds dodgy, eh?

41. Do you have any tattoos?
Only in my dream. (not dreamS ah, one dream only)

42. Are you sarcastic?
Yea, right.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
What's that?

44. Ever walked into a wall?
Hahaha. What?! No! Ask me if I've ever walked through a wall.

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
Yes. Can you guess who?

47. Is your hair curly?
I wish.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
Chris Rice's Living Room Sessions. Nice to study with :)

49. Do looks matter?
Yes.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
I hope so.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
Prepaid :)

52. Do you like your life right now?
Ok la, not bad.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
No.

54. Can you handle the truth?
Yes.

55. Do you have good vision?
No. :(

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
No.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
Almost daily, but hardly ever for long periods of time.

60. What is your favorite animal?
Lori the slow lorris!

61. Where was your default picture taken?
(This was from Facebook) In Pulau Perhentian.

62. Can you hula hoop?
Nope :(

63. Do you have a job?
No.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
Pastry, for breakfast tomorrow.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
I don't think so.

I tag...
Sue Ann
Jo Lyn
Wai Choong
Wai Min
Wai Han
Rachael Wong
Schmae

Aku rindu kucing.

2009-05-26T01:16:00.002+08:00

Of all the pesky furballs I've had,

I miss FattyCat the most.

:(

So help me God.

2009-05-24T02:03:00.006+08:00

I draw my life source from the River of Life. Jesus said "Drink, and you'll never thirst again".

Teach me to wait.

And please, oh please
let me hear You teaching me to wait.

2009-05-20T02:26:00.002+08:00

I cling to the Cross
and everything it means
I know its the only hope there is for saving me
for without Your great Mercy
I would be forever lost
with a thankful heart I come
and cling to the Cross.

Aiseh man.

2009-05-16T02:06:00.008+08:00

After snuffy made me look at her class' yearbook pictures, I felt nostalgic and wanted to look at our Upper Six 6 yearbook page again. ('Cos our layout was so cool)
I went to my bookcase and looked for my last Taman SEA yearbook, Samudra 2007 and couldn't find it. The first thought that came to my mind was "Sue Ann took it. -.-". And was going to yell down the stairs to her to ask where it is, when I counted backwards and realised;

I finished Form 6 in 2006.

Sigh.

We're not that old! :(

Time again.

2009-05-15T02:35:00.003+08:00

I always notice the time.

I thought it was Saturday already because today (it's now Friday in the 2.38 a.m.) I woke up at seven a.m., which is something like eight hours earlier than I normally do. And then just now at 2.28 (now it's 2.39), it felt like TWO days have passed instead of one, felt a lot longer than it usually does.

I really should start waking up earlier.

The highlights of the day were :

The dodgy transaction was quick and painless (Thank You, Lord)
Mak Yee and I met up for diluted Japanese Green Tea and Nyonya food, which was great (both the meet up and the food. Definitely not the green tea tho. yech. Don't go to O*iental Cra*ings)

Mak Yee :)

7.40 a.m.

2009-05-14T07:40:00.003+08:00

Being up at this hour - it's not even really bright out yet - has it perks. For one thing, hot coffee actually tastes nice and warm, like hot coffee should.
It's also really cold because it rained last night, and I know it won't be this cold for long (I give it two hours for the heatwave to come back) and I should take advantage of the morning and go for a walk or something. But I'm scared 0f getting my arm slashed by desperate foreign workers who would do anything for some petty cash :(

Ok, ok. One shouldn't be so gloomy and dreary in the morning, especially on a beautiful morning such as this. The birds are chirping outside, so I should chirp too.

Lovely morning! :)

Life in an oven.

2009-05-11T12:58:00.003+08:00

So,

complain.
The long awaited holidays are finally here. When I was not on holiday, I had all sorts of plans for these next two months. Work? Not work? Shop? But how to shop without work? Go for MYPG/FWP/etc? Who would hire me for work for only one month, then?
So, despite having all these plans - too many in fact - I'm now sitting here; it's the first day of my 2 month (on the calendar, May has 31 days and June has 30) break, and I find myself wondering what to do with, well, myself.
Actually there are alot of things I could do, all the stuff I'd left for later for all the times I had procrastinated.
Like clean out the fish bowl.
Finish making last year's Christmas present that I owe everyone.
Finish reading the pile of books that I had gone through halfway. (and had left for later because I found something more enjoyable to read)
Clean out my closet.
Clean my room.

But I just don't want to do them now, maybe later. Heh.

It doesn't help that it's suuuuuuuper hot and the sky is as blue as kerabu (no sign of rain), and the aircond in my room went *pok* yesterday and wouldn't turn on since.

Today, all I've done is make myself a mug on Nescafe Regular and put ice.

That's pretty good for a hot day's worth, don't you think? :)

2009-05-09T23:38:00.001+08:00

crunchy pastry :)

Second last day! :D

2009-05-06T23:55:00.005+08:00

I heart P.J, of course.

Because P.J. is home to...only the awesomemest pasar malams in the whole world! But in a way, I'll miss being here (in Bangi) also. I'll miss :

my housemates (ahem, better say first in case one of them reads this).
Metro Kajang Ground Floor Mamak Tom Yam - yum!
can sleep and wake up anytime I want without getting nagged at. (yes, even at 22!)
roaming aimlessly (exploring) Kajang town and yonder.
the quiet, slow, uncongested lifestyle.
Nasi Lemak in the mornings.
my room here is neater than back home.
the UKM library.

but well, goodbye Bangi. I love P.J. more than you. :)

till July only la, then it's back to school. So don't get too excited.

bold.

2009-05-02T02:19:00.005+08:00

Something in my heart is burning like a fire;
"I want to live for You"
Need Your touch right now, fill me with Your power
"I want to live for You, my God"

I will not be moved
I will stand for You

I will go where You send me
Jesus take me now, I am Yours
I am Yours
I lay my life on the altar
Everything I give to You alone
Here I am

I love You, Jesus, because You first loved me.

2009-04-24T17:55:00.002+08:00

. Why you so clever one?

<3

2009-04-21T21:07:00.003+08:00

You're a part-time lover and a full-time friend
The monkey on your back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

I'll kiss you on the brain in the shadow of the train
I'll kiss you all starry-eyed, my body swinging from side to side
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

Pebbles forgive me, the trees forgive
So why can't you forgive me?
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

I will find my niche in your car
With my MP3, DVD, rumble pack, guitar
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start
Just because we use cheats doesn't mean we're not smart
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

You are always trying to keep it real
I'm in love with how you feel
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

We both have shiny happy fits of rage
You want more fans, I want more stage
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you

Squinched up your face and did a dance
Shook a little turd out of the bottom of your pants
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else
But you
But you

Moldy Peaches

Just like old times.

2009-04-13T01:22:00.003+08:00

Joseph and Shannon came over with a LOT of McDonald's for a good time of catching up. (And to celebrate my long past birthday).

Haha. Thanks guys :)

Monster Pear

2009-04-10T23:10:00.003+08:00

This is the giant pear that I bought from Giant just now. (hehheh)
Look at how gianormous it is!
I've cut it into seven pieces and am going to eat it all my byself. :)